Thought I’d spend some time this morning composing a new post to update people on the last week or so of life. Birthday fortnight ended well… I received a lot of Chapters gift cards over Christmas and my birthday so last week I purchased five knitting books, some of which have been coming in the mail one by one over the last couple of days. This allowed me to spend Monday afternoon teaching myself how to increase and decrease stitches which means I can make more than just a scarf that goes in a straight line. I also discovered that there is a yarn shop in Ancaster so will be checking that out soon (although I assume the yarn will be tres expensive and outside of my price range).
Danielle, Eric and I spent the weekend at Muskoka Woods Sports Resort with 11 of our junior high-ers. It was cold and we didn’t sleep a lot but I actually really enjoyed the time there. Most of the girls that we took are kids that have been around for 2-3 years now so I know I can trust them and they’re starting to mature into semi-responsible young women (who would’ve thought?). The speaker didn’t totally relate with our kids but gave a good jumping off spot to have some really interesting conversations about what it means to follow Jesus. Some of the kids that I assume aren’t really interested had some surprising answers… God is doing some good stuff. The kids also love singing and dancing during worship. They head right up to the front to form some sort of crazy mosh pit. It’s always the highlight of their weekend.
January feels like a ridiculously busy month. This weekend we are away again for a leadership retreat with our church. The church is starting this leadership development program that involves coursework, assignments and regular mentoring. I’m excited to see what happens… even though I completed the first assignment (which is just a questionnaire about leadership style) and wasn’t totally pleased with how it was laid out. I have high expectations for the program to shape me so we’ll see what happens this weekend.
I’m reading this book right now (have been for about a month now) called Men and Women in the Church. It’s one of those books that is changing my life. I have been really blessed in my interactions with male Christian leadership throughout my life but this book is opening my eyes to some of the things I have picked up through interactions with other men (and women) that are not biblical. There is a lot in the book about how the church teaches women to ‘hold back’ on gifts of leadership because it’s not appropriate for women to be strong and confident. It’s been interesting for me to realize how these ideas about gender have shaped my personality, my identity and my beliefs. I’ve also become super aware lately of when people use gender in conversation… I realized a couple weeks ago that it annoys me suddenly that our society uses the word ‘girly’ to demean and put down men… when did being female become a put down (and when did male become defined as “not like women”?)? There are so many beginnings of questions forming in my mind. I am tempted to just become this mass of anger, offense and bitterness but, thankfully, God offers other options. He’s been teaching me that He may even have a place for me in all of this… and that I need to accept (and use) the gifts of leadership He has given me.
I’m still doing a little thinking about the future… but it takes a really different form than the stressed out thoughts of a couple of weeks ago. I don’t know what God has on deck and He’s continuing to show me things I’m holding onto that I need to turn over to Him.
Oh yeah… last night our ‘community’ met for dinner. Gloria, in all her wisdom, had suggested we take some time after dinner to just hear each other’s stories and then take communion together. It was super powerful. I think I’d forgotten that the people around me are also human and have stories that have shaped them into who they currently are. It was really neat to hear them share about their lives. I don’t think I’ve ever felt so called to the Lord’s Table either… communion just made complete and total sense in that moment. It was a neat experience. I think that’s all. I need to finish cleaning the kitchen.
